Brewer's Droop #193
THIS SPORTING LIFE
A man goes to a casino with R100 and, after a couple of hours and hugely risky bets, he wins R1 million and is clearly very happy. Then, as he loses all sense of reality, the bets start going wrong and his pile of chips diminish to R150 and, since he’s now sitting at a table where the minimum bet is R200 wearily gets up and leaves.
When he gets home his wife asks how he did and he says “not bad, I won R50”.
Of course, he’s right. But he’s also wrong because he’s conveniently sanitised a critical part of the evening and forgotten that moment when he had a million. It’s myopic accountancy.
So when I read what Alec Moemi said recently about the costs of Beyonce performing at the SA Sports Awards it’s obvious that he’s as deluded as the man in the casino.
He denied the rumours and said they were a “fabrication” adding that any cost for bringing the star here might be part of a sponsorship package. In fact he said “if we can get Beyonce without paying for Beyonce we’d be very keen. It’s a lie to say we are paying for it…sponsors would pay for it. The base cost of the awards is ours.”
I’m hoping one of his friends will forward this message to him because he really does need a little lesson in fundamental cost-accounting.
You see Alec, if you have a sponsor who’s prepared to pay Beyonce R17m then they are going to want something in return and whichever way you cut it, that R17m is NOT going to reduce your “base cost” and our local stars will also be denied the opportunity of performing too.
You’re like the guy at the casino…if you’re doing a deal with a sponsor and he’s prepared to kick in that much money then tell him he can have the deal on condition that the cash stays in South Africa. Because when the party’s over you might wake up and think “at one stage we had R17m but we lost it.”
I agree that it’s very nice to rub shoulders (or any part of the body for that matter) with international stars, but R17m for an hour’s work and a couple of hours socialising with you and your mates? Really?
Come to think of it, I wonder how many teams could be sent to the Olympics for R17m?
So be smart Alec and help your Sports Minister, Fikile Mbalula out here, to prioritise what’s really important in sports development (a clue: it’s not about promoting an international singer who just bought her husband a R325 million plane for Father’s Day).
AN INTERESTING BUT LITTLE KNOWN FACT
The first testicular guard (“box”) was used in cricket in1874
And the first cricket safety helmet was used in 1974.
Which means….. It took 100 years for men to realise that their brains may also be important!
RETURN OF THE BLITHERING IDIOT
I was on a TV chat show some time ago (see Droop 184) and one of the guests was that myopic bigot, Dr. Salojee, who I doubt is capable of sitting the right way round on a lavatory let alone pontificate on social values.
He insisted that the anti-smoking legislation had been hugely successful in reducing the number of smokers – and I told him he was wrong, producing the figures to prove it.
But he arrogantly dismissed my numbers and said I’d cherry-picked only a couple of years to make my point but that if I looked at the complete picture then I’d agree that he was right.
I remembered this when I saw his rant in the press recently about how alcohol advertising should be banned, so this time I took all the figures from 1995 to 2011.
In 16 years the number of smokers is down by only 9% and he calls that success? And the contribution to that number from the banning of alcohol must be extremely small. Idiot.
Obviously the various bans surrounding smoking have mainly failed which is why he and his gang of we-know-what’s-best-for-you dickheads are introducing even more legislation so that smokers will be forced to stand in the middle of a field or stay at home if they wish to smoke.
Perhaps that’ll work?
Somehow I don’t think it will.
Having said that, truly responsible companies like Discovery, who actively encourage people to stop smoking by offering great incentives, are probably doing a far better job. In fact, they’re probably responsible for that small decrease anyway – so good for them.
I wonder if anyone has any information on that?
AND LASTLY, SOME BREAKING NEWS
All the toilets in the Sandton police station have been stolen. The police have nothing to go on.